And The Weiner Is…
On March 22, 1934 Horton Smith won the first ever Augusta National Invitational, which would later come to be known as The Masters. On January 15th, 1967 the Green Bay Packers hoisted the first Lombardi Trophy over their heads by defeating the Kansas City Chiefs in Super Bowl I.
And now following in that winning tradition, on July 4th, 2010 Phillip Clemandot won the first ever Clemandot Hot Dog Eating Championship and is the first rightful owner of the prestigious Golden Weiner.
It was a day for celebrating Independence for sure. We were celebrating the Independence that our Fore Fathers won from the British. We celebrated the Independence that we still hold today from outside oppressions thanks to the men and women of our armed forces. And for one skinny, 13 year old boy from Wichita Falls, TX, celebrating Independence from…well fr
om never winning a hot dog eating contest. And what a celebration it was!
The competitors in this tournament traveled from far and wide. David Clemandot, Robin Murphy-Clemandot, and Phillip Clemandot traveled from all four corners of the house. And Timothy Sawyer, he even traveled from an adjacent neighborhood, nearly 5 minutes away!
The stringent qualifications for the competition ranged from “Had eaten a hot dog before” to “Had absolutely nothing better to do that day.” When the opening click of the stopwatch fired, it was clear this competition was going to come down to the two Clemandot men: David and Phillip. Both starting their third hot dog before the two minute mark, it was clear David and Phillip were in this thing to the heart burn-inducing end.
On March 22, 1934 Horton Smith won the first ever Augusta National Invitational, which would later come to be known as The Masters. On January 15th, 1967 the Green Bay Packers hoisted the first Lombardi Trophy over their heads by defeating the Kansas City Chiefs in Super Bowl I.
And now following in that winning tradition, on July 4th, 2010 Phillip Clemandot won the first ever Clemandot Hot Dog Eating Championship and is the first rightful owner of the prestigious Golden Weiner.
It was a day for celebrating Independence for sure. We were celebrating the Independence that our Fore Fathers won from the British. We celebrated the Independence that we still hold today from outside oppressions thanks to the men and women of our armed forces. And for one skinny, 13 year old boy from Wichita Falls, TX, celebrating Independence from…well fr
om never winning a hot dog eating contest. And what a celebration it was!The competitors in this tournament traveled from far and wide. David Clemandot, Robin Murphy-Clemandot, and Phillip Clemandot traveled from all four corners of the house. And Timothy Sawyer, he even traveled from an adjacent neighborhood, nearly 5 minutes away!
The stringent qualifications for the competition ranged from “Had eaten a hot dog before” to “Had absolutely nothing better to do that day.” When the opening click of the stopwatch fired, it was clear this competition was going to come down to the two Clemandot men: David and Phillip. Both starting their third hot dog before the two minute mark, it was clear David and Phillip were in this thing to the heart burn-inducing end.
Tim and Robin, just in awe of the sheer ferocity with which the two Clemandots were attacking their hot dogs, were overheard saying things such as “I’m just going to have one hot dog, and then save room for a hamburger.” And “I think I might try to eat two.” And “Do you t
hink I could have some chips with mine, I want to enjoy it.” Ball don’t lie, indeed.
hink I could have some chips with mine, I want to enjoy it.” Ball don’t lie, indeed.However, the two-way race started to take a turn for the worse for Phillip’s strikingly handsome father at around the 5 minute mark. David was on his fifth hot dog and struggling, while Phillip was cruising through his sixth. Now seventh.
The sweat and tears were mounting for David as he was overheard quoting “Is it getting hot in here?” Then, when it looked like all hope was lost, at the 8 minute mark David noticed Phillip slowing down. Noting that he was a full two hot dogs behind the younger challenger, he made a tactical error that would ultimately seal his doom.
“I saw him slowing way down at the 8 minute mark”, David would later tell our sideline reporter, “I thought I could use this time to take a 30 second break, and then slam down two or maybe even three more hotdogs while I was rested.”
But the decision would prove to be his un-doing, as the 30 second break allowed his stomach the time it needed to send his brain the “If you stick one more damn hot dog down my throat, I’m gonna make you pay, bitch!” signal.
When it was all said and done, Phillip Clemandot was the proud new owner of the coveted Golden Weiner trophy. But more importantly than that, a new era was born. A new rivalry between the two Clemandot men. A new tradition of nobody but the two Clemandot men caring about the competition. And, most significantly…A new champion was born. A man amongst ruggedly, handsome men. On this Independence Day, Phillip Clemandot is your true Weiner!
“I saw him slowing way down at the 8 minute mark”, David would later tell our sideline reporter, “I thought I could use this time to take a 30 second break, and then slam down two or maybe even three more hotdogs while I was rested.”
But the decision would prove to be his un-doing, as the 30 second break allowed his stomach the time it needed to send his brain the “If you stick one more damn hot dog down my throat, I’m gonna make you pay, bitch!” signal.
When it was all said and done, Phillip Clemandot was the proud new owner of the coveted Golden Weiner trophy. But more importantly than that, a new era was born. A new rivalry between the two Clemandot men. A new tradition of nobody but the two Clemandot men caring about the competition. And, most significantly…A new champion was born. A man amongst ruggedly, handsome men. On this Independence Day, Phillip Clemandot is your true Weiner!
