In doing my due diligence of researching certain players and organizations in the NFL for the sake of deciding which team I feel comfortable rooting for, I came across seven disturbing facts about players and members of the Washington Redskins organization.
Read on if you'd like, but I must warn you: some of these facts are a little disturbing. I have gone through the proper channels however, and I can guarantee you that these are all 100% true or my name is not James Westfall.
The Facts:
1. Robert Griffin the 3rd or better known as RG3, the new quarterback of the Redskins, likes to rape kittens.
2. Brian Orakpo gets sexually aroused by adolescent sewer rats.
3. Tim Hightower, running back, taught John Hinkley Jr. everything he knows about guns... and Jodie Foster.
4. London Fletcher beats nuns to death... with the corpse of Caylee Anthony.
5. DeAngelo Hall claims he has two heroes in life: Jerry Sandusky and Satan.
6. Neil Rackers, their kicker of all people, helps old ladies across the street and then beats them mercilessly and drags them back to the other side of the street again.
7. Mike Shanahan, head coach of the Redskins, sexually assualts his own mother on a daily basis... And she's been dead for 33 years!
Disturbing, I know. But by bringing this information about the Washington Redskins to light, maybe we can all start to heal... just a little bit.
Enjoy football season and, if you're a Redskins' fan, enjoy the 7 corridors of hell.
Tuesday, August 14, 2012
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